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I was grateful to my Cuban doctor, also an older Mum, who sympathised with the miscarriage but advised to move straight on to donor eggs. I heard so many stories of failed IVF attempts by friends, it happened to them and I knew I didn't have that kind of time or money. A friend had gone the donation route (UK women often go to Spain for this) and I could see she had no regrets. People wonder whether it's strange, that you don't see yourself in your child, but as they get older they develop their personalities that are so unique, that you can't expect them to be copiies of us anyway. I wonder at my child every day and I am sure I could not love her anymore than I do, no matter what genes she has.

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Julie van Maanen
Julie van Maanen

Written by Julie van Maanen

Top writer in Parenting. Multi-lingual traveller, writer, learner, teacher. Raising my little girl in Cuba and Europe and cannot wait to show her the world.

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